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Wedding season is at its peak, and if you have a wedding to attend this year, you know that it comes with significant costs. Whether you must travel to a different city or country, reserve a hotel, find a babysitter or purchase a new outfit to fit dress codes – simply attending a wedding as an ordinary guest can get pricy. On average, from spending money on travel, gifts and more, a wedding guest will spend around $600, according to Bankrate.
When planning to attend a wedding, whether a family member or a friend, the overall cost might be something you are nervous about, especially after booking hotels or buying a new outfit. Then, as the day comes closer, you might start to think about the wedding gifts.
Wedding gifts are customary at weddings, whether you buy something off the couple's registry or give them cash or a check. The purpose of the gift is to celebrate and support the couple as they begin their lives together. However, as you sit down and think about what or how much you are to give the couple, especially after spending hundreds of dollars to attend their wedding, you may wonder how much is appropriate to spend on a gift.
According to the wedding website The Knot, people spend, on average, $150 for a wedding gift. However, many different factors can determine how much you spend. These include your relationship with the couple (those closer to the couple tend to spend more) and how far you must travel for the wedding.
Finding something on the registry or giving the couple a card with cash is acceptable when giving a gift. Wedding registries usually have gifts in various price ranges, so it should be easy to find something that fits your budget for the couple. Some people also include group gifts or cash funds on their registry so that instead of buying something expensive, you can put money towards a more significant gift, like $50 towards a set of stainless steel pans.
This is a situation where you may spend more on the gift. For your best friend or family member, people tend to spend closer to $200 on a gift for their wedding.
However, you don't have to spend that much simply because you know the couple well. Before choosing how much to give, keep in mind other gifts you may have given the couple. Since you are close, you may have already given them an engagement gift, bridal gift and even a gift for the bachelorette or bachelor party. If this is the case and you want to spend less this go-around, then that is completely okay as well.
If you are attending a wedding for a colleague or a coworker, you may be unsure of how much is appropriate. On average, people spend between $50 and $100 on a gift for a colleague or coworker. If you've known them for years, you may want to spend more than if you've only them for a year or so.
Similar to a gift to a colleague and a coworker, you may not feel the need to spend as much as you would for a close family member or friend. If you are attending the wedding of a distant cousin or acquaintance, you can still give them something nice without breaking the bank. Many registries will have gifts in the $50 range, or even a card and cash will suffice. This way, you can still give them something to celebrate their marriage without breaking the bank.
While people can spend upwards of $600 for being a guest at a wedding, being a bridesmaid or groomsman can cost $1,000+. While many factors go into this, such as sometimes having to get a second night at a hotel, hair and makeup, a more specific outfit, etc., it is very likely you’ll pay more if you are in a wedding compared to if you are just a wedding guest. Also, when you are in the wedding, you may have other costs before the wedding, such as a bachelor or bachelorette party, shower or more.
While it is still customary to give a gift even if you are in the wedding, you should still make sure you are giving a gift you can afford. If you are already overspending, give a smaller gift or something with more sentential value.
A wedding is considered a destination wedding if they take place outside of the couple's hometown and will require travel and accommodation. Destination weddings can range from a particular city to a wedding in Italy. Depending on the destination, these types of weddings tend to cost guests even more, especially if they are traveling someplace far and have to spend multiple nights at a hotel.
When it comes to a gift, it is still customary to give one, even at a destination wedding. However, if you cannot afford to go to the wedding in general because it is a destination, don't. Attendance usually drops for destination weddings due to the cost of travel and accommodations. On the other hand, some couples may ask guests to forgo a gift. If that is the case, it should be explicitly stated on the invitation or wedding website.
Sending a gift if you are not attending the wedding is entirely up to you. While highly thoughtful, it is optional. If you do wish to send something, it can be smaller compared to what you would give if you were attending the wedding. How much you spend, and if you send anything at all, can still depend widely on your relationship with the couple.
While giving a gift at a wedding is customary, there is no need to overdo it or put yourself into debt to attend a wedding. Always give something that you are comfortable with regarding your finances. A wedding gift is supposed to be just that, something special for the couple to celebrate their marriage. There is no need to overdo it simply because others are giving more significant gifts or because you feel you need to.
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